My mate told his wife

My mate recently told his wife that she should start masturbating….she went fucking bananas!

Woman gets superglued to toilet seat

A woman had to be yanked off a public toilet seat after a prankster smothered it with extra strong superglue. The unfortunate incident occurred at a Home Depot store in Georgia, US, after the shopper went to use the bathroom. When she tried to get up after relieving herself she found she was unable to … [Read the full story]

Husband says to wife…

Husband says to wife, “My Olympic condoms have arrived … I think I’ll wear Gold tonight.” Wife says, “Why not wear Silver and come second for a change.”

Funnies

A man walks into a library and says, “Have you got a book on Tourette Syndrome?” The librarian replies, “Fuck-off – you cunt!” The man says, “Yes, that’s the one”.

What is Anal Sex?

Anal sex is a form of sexual activity practiced by people who suffer from obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). It generally resembles normal sexual activity in that tab A goes energetically into slot B, but the participants mutually consent to keep it as sanitary and orderly as possible. The term is derived from the English words “anal”, … [Read the full story]

Morning coffee with Catholics

Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee in St.Peters Square . The first Catholic man tells his friends, “My son is a priest.  When he walks into a room, everyone calls him ‘Father‘.” The second Catholic man chirps, “My son is a Bishop.  When he walks into a room people call him … [Read the full story]

Funnies

An Italian, a Greek and an Aussie are talking about there sex lives. The Italian said, “Last night, I smeared my wife with Italian Olive Oil, made mad passionate love, and the wife screamed for five minutes”. The Greek said, “That’s nothing, last night I smeared my wife Feta cheese, made mad passionate love, and … [Read the full story]

The Haircut

A teenage boy had just passed his driving test and inquired of his father as to when they could discuss his use of the car. His father said he’d make a deal with his son: ‘You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, and get your … [Read the full story]

I saw a fortune teller the other day…

I saw a fortune teller the other day. She told me I would come into some money. Last night I fucked a girl called Penny – is that spooky or what?

Married to a sex maniac

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