Vacuum-Cleaner Dylan wins Nobel Peace Prize

bob-dylan-looking-and-sounding-as-good-as-everSo, Bob Dylan has won a Nobel Peace Prize.

Dylan has become the 259th American to have won a Nobel Peace Prize.

My friend brought me a ticket to see Bob Dylan about 20 years ago (some friend – thanks a lot Al). I went along, you know, to see what the big deal is all about.

I didn’t find out what the fuss was all about…but I did fall asleep. You think I’m joking? – WELL, I AM NOT!

I had a lovely nap, and when I woke up…HE WAS STILL FUCKING PLAYING!

He only means something to pretentious middle-class kids growing up in…anywhere outside of America, and folk who took too many drugs and had beards down to their bollocks – and that’s just the women.

Dreadful, dreadful, dreadful, dreadful – he says nothing to me about my world.

I was more worried about putting food on the table than the American drug situation, or the American kids, or the American dream, or innocent men being put in jail – very sad, but I have to sort my own doorstep out before worrying about someone else’s – plus, his music is so very, very boring,

Winning the Nobel Peace Prize would indicate that the winner has produced ‘in the field of literature the most outstanding work in an ideal direction’.

In reality…he should have won the prize for ‘defining the best impression of a vacuum-cleaner that’s on it’s last legs’.
by
Wallace McTavish
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Comments

One Response to “Vacuum-Cleaner Dylan wins Nobel Peace Prize”
  1. Decca says:

    Bob Dylan has won countless awards, and he never collects them. He never goes to the award shoes and he does not accept awards.
    The Nobel Peace Prize authorities are disgusted with him.
    Dylan is the first musician to pick up this award.
    So Wallace, give Bob a fair go. He’s got integrity.
    I don’t know if you have, mate.

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